Saturday, December 15, 2012

Big Mammal

Pregnancy has generated a number of bon mots/words of encouragement/observations from Luke, recorded here for your amusement and my memory.

"Listen to this: [reading] when placed on the mother's abdomen, the newborn will wiggle and inch--"

"Up to the boob?  Makes sense.  She is a small mammal, you are a big mammal."

"My vagina is going to tear."

"It's ok.  It's made to do that."

"I think I could make a pretty accurate full-length self-portrait using only marbles of different sizes."

[Nodding in assent] "You look like a pile of balls."

Plus ça change, plus c'est la même chose: Venus of Willendorf circa 24,000-22,00 BCE

"It's [labor] is going to hurt so much."

"It will be terrible but not so terrible that half the people in the world don't do it over and over again.  And then it will be over and we will have a little baby."

"Did you always have those hairs on your belly, or is it just the static from your maternity pants?"

[My sister inspected this phenomenon and found them to be "just normal belly hairs, but you can wax them anyway."  In case you were wondering.]

"I really need to get on losing the baby weight after the birth."

"Except for the baby part, it's mostly in your ass and thighs."

My sister Elise: "Luke, what do you think about push prizes?"

"I don't think that Julie needs to give me a gift necessarily, but if she feels like it that's fine."

1 comment:

  1. This cracked me up! Bless your heart, Julie.