Josie Says

Morning Song by Naomi Shihab Nye

The tiny journalist

will tell us what she sees.

Document the moves, the dust,

soldiers blocking the road.

Yes, she knows how to take a picture

with her phone. Holds it high

like a balloon. Yes, she would

prefer to dance and play,

would prefer the world

to be pink. It is her job to say

what she sees, what is happening.

From her vantage point everything

is huge—but don’t look down on her.

She’s bigger than you are.

If you stomp her garden

each leaf expands its view.

Don’t hide what you do.

She sees you at 2 a.m. adjusting your

impenetrable vest.

What could she have

that you want? Her treasures,

thing shiny buttons her grandmother loved.

Her cousin, her uncle.

There might have been a shirt. . .

The tiny journalist notices

action on far away roads

farther even than the next village.

She takes counsel from bugs so

puffs of dust find her first.

Could that be a friend? 

They pretended not to see us.

They came at night with weapons. 

What was our crime? That we liked

respect as they do? That we have pride? 

She stares through a hole in the fence,

barricade of words and wire,

feels the rising fire

before anyone strikes a match.

She has a better idea.

Observations from the almost five year old ...


// After dropping off Clementine off at school and needing some gas, I told Josie we would pick up some sort of breakfast at the gas station (mom win). We pulled up to the pump and Josie said, eyes twinkling, "This is breakfast ... for the car!"

// After watching a pet rescue commercial before Dumbo in the theater, wistfully: "I wish I could be a goy*, touching a dog."

*girl

[She understands her allergies as best she can and doesn't pet dogs and cats (she can't be around cats at all)]

// Lately she's been talking about death frequently and making heartbreaking existential observations like:

   I wish I was one year old, then it would be a long time til I die.


  I know what happens when you die! You close your eyes and they put a rock on your head.



// On her upcoming visit to the Arch: I'm a wittle bit scared of swipping off - it might be swippewy!



// Luke took her on a daddy-daughter date to the botanical garden on one of the first warm days of spring. Caught unawares over a jet at the splash pad, she starting yelling at the top of her lungs: It's freezing my vulva!

Lately

// Clem, boasting about going to kindergarten: I'm going to be a [her new mascot] turtle, and Josie's just going to be some kind of fruit [the name of the daycare classroom in which Clem is currently enrolled.]

// Recently Clementine and I were talking about symbols (both girls LOVE spotting FedEx trucks) and I pointed out the Starbucks symbol as an example. Later, Clem was playing coffee shop (taking orders, delivering muffins) and she said, here's my symbol ... my jaw about dropped when I saw what she had set up: a green circle and a figure a la Starbucks.

// Josie, shushing me to not waken Clementine: Kwemmie is WIDE ASLEEP!



// Clem to Josie: Be quiet! You're interrupting my 'magination. I can't 'magine it when you're being so loud.




// Clem: How goes it get day, night, day night?
Me: The Earth is spinning and when we face away from the sun, it's nighttime, and when we spin to face the sun, it's daytime.
(later)
Me: It's morning! So which way are we facing?
Clem: We are facing the sun!



// Clementine to Josie after a game of who knows what: It's a tie...so I win.



// Josie, waking up to pee at 4:15 am, said to me groggily, apropos of nothing: Sometimes rainbows like the rain... and sometimes they don't.



// Occasionally Google Photos will create these movies out of nowhere... they are so wonderful but utterly devastating.

Lately

We brought a dinner of Qdoba to Jenny (post-injury: mix yourself a paloma and read about that here). She had a Get Well Soon balloon in her living room and...

Clem: Where did you get that balloon?

Jenny: My sister gave it to me in the hospital, after I fell.

Clem: (quizzically) Did you fall on your birthday?

🎈

Josie, peering at a zit on Grandma's face: You have a little nipple on your face.
Clementine, quick to correct: THAT'S NOT A NIPPLE! THESE [points emphatically to her chest] ARE NIPPLES!


😬


 Came home from spin class to Clementine wailing: Josie said I DON'T ... LOOK... FANCY!!!


👑


Clementine, up on the bathroom counter so she could look at her entire outfit (tank top, bike shorts, Birkenstocks, flower crown headband), shaking her hips and saying, I LIKE MYSELF!


💯


And, I just think this is hilarious: Josie loves yellow mustard.



Our neighbor's backyard.

Qdoba dinner. (It's a theme).

I saw these mermaid purses in the hospital gift shop and bought them (pink and purple).

They turned out to be perfect for stuffing with figurines and bringing to dinner.

Unicorn patrol.

Lately

// Josie, putting her hand in the pocket of a re-discovered fleece jacket: "Ooo! A pocket for rocks."


// Josie has begun to draw human figures ... but NOT as well as Clemmie.





// This scene in the living room:

"Let her come to me," said Clementine, holding aloft a battery-operated nightlight. Josie played her part as Te Ka, crawling toward Clementine on her hands and knees. "You know who you are," Clementine sang softly.



// Every single time Luke picks up Josie she strokes the back of his head.






// Josie, after a stern lecture about how to hold the new Disney CDs so they don't get scratched, holding a CD gingerly: I think it has an itch on it.


// Josie was putting on her pajamas and after grabbing something from Luke corrected herself: "Oh Daddy. I sorry. I snatch."


// In case you were wondering...






// Swan Lake moments. They know the story from a beautifully illustrated book from my childhood. They thrill when - gasp! - we turn to the page when the beautiful Odile becomes a ghoul.

Darndest Things

Mommy and Moi

Luke and Clem were looking at a picture in Highlights and she said, "I like those cruss-taunts."

Luke: What's a cruss-taunt?

C: Cruss-taunts. I had them with Mommy...it was like a hotel but not a hotel and a whole bunch of people were there. I had a cruss-taunt and I liked it.

Luke finally figured out that she was talking about croissants that she had at our friend's high rise condo ("like a hotel but not a hotel") five months ago.

Mirror Mirror

Clem to Josie, after they got dressed for their first playdate with the neighbors: Josie, you look cute! (dashes to bathroom mirror, runs back into bedroom) I look cute too!

Peas and No Thank You

Me, urging Clem to eat her peas: They're good. They're sweet! I bet if you close your eyes they taste like Skittles!

Clem: (closes her eyes, chews slowly) They taste like... the same pea.

Practical Magic

Clem: I keep asking the fairy for my old magic wand and she only brings me chocolate.

Big Box Store

Josie, to Luke during checkout at Walgreens, gesturing to the cashier: She is a girl. She has a vulva... she has a (growling for emphasis) BIIIIG VULVA.

Lately

💬  C arranged chairs, the tiny piano, and the largest stuffed animals around a pallet Josie was lying on. "We're playing nighttime! Do you know why I put these fings around her? It's bedtime. [Emphatically] It's NOT a trap."

🌠  After we exited the My Little Pony movie (all about friendship), I asked the girls, "what was that movie about?"

"PONIES!" shouted Josie.


💝  I put the fairy door in Clem's room and explained the fairy might leave treats every now and then. I found Clem with her hands clasped in front of her, beseeching the fairy for "a unicorn. A REAL one."

Me: Where will the unicorn sleep?

C: In my room. [pause] On the floor.


💓 Josie climbed into bed with us one weekday morning.

Me: Josie, I have to jump in the shower.

Josie: When you get out of the shower, can you lay down on your pillow so I can hug you?

🍴 Josie: "My tummy hurts, I'm hungry. I need to eat of LOT of food." She also pantomimes conversations with her tummy. "Are you hungry?" "Yes I am," comes the reply in a high voice.



🐓Everything Fried Is A Chicken Nugget:

Josie, eating a McDonald's hash brown: I wuv dis big chicken nugget.

Clem, nibbling on an onion ring: I like this chicken in a circle.

"Are these bears?" "No, snowmen!"

SaveSave

Lately

Josie's Language is Developing So Much and It Makes Me So Happy

Facetiming with Daddy:

Luke: Hi girls!

Josie: [deadpan; Clem was downstairs] There's only one girl here.


Earth Science

Luke to Clementine, watching Bambi for the first time: Is Bambi going to be safe from the fire in the river?

Clem: No, there are sharks.

Josie: SHARKS LIVE IN SALTWATER! (Then she mumbled to herself for assurance, sharks live in saltwater.... I fink sharks live in saltwater...)



Princess Movies > Sports

Me: I'm going to find you a new swim coach now that Miss Alyssa went to college.

Clem: A coach? Like Cinderella?




Prodigal Pascal One of Clementine's birthday presents was a plastic figurine of Rapunzel's chameleon sidekick Pascal. He was lost promptly because of his small size. Sometimes I ask the girls where he's gone and lately Josie says: I think he went back to Tangled. Me: Back to the movie? Yes. I ordered a new Pascal and Luke and I are plotting his re-discovery. I'm hoping the girls will be beside themselves with his reappearance - delighting them is the highlight of our lives - but likely they will be nonchalant.

Lately

A collection of the funny (or not so funny) things they've said and done recently.


// Clementine, holding aloft a purple bra after rummaging through my lingerie basket: "Did you know Josie got dis bra in the potty? And Daddy put water on it and got it clean." (No, no I didn't.)

// Clementine, skeleton-obsessed and looking pensively out the car window: "Snowmans don't have bones, do they?"

   ...shows me her scraped elbow: CAN YOU SEE MY BONES?


// Watching the opening credits of Land Before Time:

Josie: A jellyfish!
Clementine: (reproachfully) No, it's a swimming dragon!

// Clementine looked at this illustration from I Dissent and said, "she's holding her hand the wrong way." -- this pose is awkward and doesn't really make sense.

// Declan, the Boy at School. SIGH. We started hearing about him a few months ago.


C: (upon finding a butterfly barrette) Will you put this in my hair... I think Declan will be at school tomorrow.
Me: Why do you want to wear this barrette?
C: Because if I look pretty he will like me.
Me: (aghast, sees the toxicity in Disney princess movies)


C: Declan built a pirate ship and I nodded (pantomimes how she nodded vigorously and smiled widely in approval) and then I played dress-up and he said I looked beautiful. And then we danced and the big blocks were our stage.

// Learning to fist bump:

// Breakfast of cold pizza: Josie leans over to Clementine, taps the slices in their hands together and says: CHEERS.

// I was lying on the floor and Clementine began to "measure" me; "I'm measuring how many angers [acres] you are," she said, referencing the paragraph and illustration below in Saint George and the Dragon, a book we had not read in a while:

Interview with Clementine

At 3 years 8 months.

Lately

// Clem looked me up and down in the morning and said slowly, "Panties and buh-rah." 

// When talking to Clem in her crib about our plans for the next day (mac and cheese! a popsicle!) she leaned in, rubbed my nose with her nose, and said in a fairly patronizing way, "Ugga mugga." (Any Daniel Tiger fans out there?)

// Taunting Josie: "I'm going to winned you!" [triumph over]

Clem's favorite books these days are Make Way for Ducklings and It's an Orange Aardvark! (Thanks, Judy!) She loves to swim, "put on my dress ups", help with cooking, and ride her bike. I adore how much she talks and narrates everything, including a recent trip through my hospital (aka the hasta-bull) to have a cafeteria doughnut before I took her to school:

SO MANY BEE-TEE-FULL PWANTS IN THIS HASTA-BULL! (admiring the Chinese evergreens)
FISHIES! PURPLE FISHIES! (Aquarium in admissions)
LOOK AT THE DOCTAHS! (people in scrubs)
LOOK AT THE QUEEN AND HER BABY! (statue of Mary and Jesus)
YOU GOT BI-NOC-A-LERS (binoculars = microscope)


Josie is talking more and more which is so encouraging. She's added short phrases like "I find it" to her vocabulary. Her favorite animals requested by name each night are Jirj (Curious George all the way from Texas) and Fox (a stuffed fox given to Clem, who's never been one for loveys. Josie loves stuffed animals). She still has no word for Clementine, curiously enough.

She loves spicy food - eg Luke's three-squirts-of-Sriracha-added ground beef - I find this astonishing. She indicates that it's "bye-shee" then grins and eats it. Weird, huh? She eats kalamata olives, bits of lettuce, green beans, meat. She often chews up something like a piece of ham, sucks out all of the moisture, and spits out the dry bits. It's a reverse au jus that we call an au Jo.

How much time do you have? That's how much cottage cheese she will eat. Cups and cups and cups.

Josie asks for Finding Nemo by name ("watch Nee-no!"), gets very scared during the Beauty and the Beast wolf attack scenes, and will sit mesmerized by Daniel Tiger and Curious George.

Me: Josie, what is Nemo's daddy's name?
Josie: FISH.
Me: Touché.

We found out tonight that she can sing part of the alphabet -- we had absolutely no idea!

Lately

// Clementine within earshot of the middle-aged woman she was observing walking to her apartment: "LOOK AT THAT OLD LADY! She's going to go inside, change her cwothes, and go to bed." [All behaviors she is familiar with from observing her mother.]

// We gave up on the girls sharing a room but before we did we would instruct them as we closed the door: "No talking! No talking!" Now when we announce it's bedtime Josie immediately pipes up NO TALK, NO TALK but it sounds more like nuh tuck, nuh tuck. Luke and I like to mimic this later like it's Josie's secret Russian accent.

// Josie had a speech evaluation and she does have a delay but nothing too serious and she doesn't qualify for any state services. Her receptive language is advanced for her age, though, and the speech pathologist described her as "fiercely independent." Verrrrry diplomatic.

// In a fit of "we should do more Montessori things!" I bought this knife about six or more months ago. I allowed C to use it once and deemed it too sharp and I secreted it away. My mom brought a loaf of banana bread over last week and I suggested that C cut it... to which she responded, "with my orange knife?" I was astounded that she would remember it; we used it once and never discussed it again.

Clem-isms

// Clementine summarizing a description of camping with Grandma and Grandpa in which s'mores figure prominently: "I eat marshmallows at night time?"

// After a review of the day's schedule and all the fun before her nap and after her nap: "Two funs?"

// Rhyming is a new favorite! She'll come up with a pair -- door, more! and shout "DOZE ARE WYMES!" She makes up lots of nonsense ones but occasionally will come up with some gems like BONG - DONG! and FOUR - WHORE!





// Lately she's been into skeletons, talking about them, who has one, etc. I pulled up Google images for examples and now she asks for SKELETONS ON YOUR PHONE! We looked at this image and she said: "That's not a skeleton that's a bone cat!"

I'm thinking about surprising her with these pjs buuuut 1) we're having trouble getting them to sleep so glow-in-the-dark is a no-glow no-go and 2) I've always found skeletons very macabre. So it's cats x 2 for us.

// Upon stepping outside: "It's not too hot! It's not too cold! It's a great day! ... I don't like the sun, but I like the hot."

// At the grocery store: "THEY GOT PURPLE GRAPES, LIKE THE J!" [the J is our new gym -- a new gym with a snack bar]

// Singing Luke's song "Everybody Tells Me" to herself in her crib:




// Where she would live if we let her, the spwash pad.

Josie's On A Vacation Far Away

The girls are in Michigan while we pack up here, pretty much having the time of their lives with their grandparents and many cousins there. We've been Facetiming and receiving photos, videos, updates, and quotable quotes:

[preface: C accepts only intact things - broken things are unacceptable, i.e. half of a huge cookie is not as good as an intact small cookie, etc] Grandpa gave C half of a cookie which she refused; she wanted the whole thing.

Grandpa, seizing on a teachable moment: You have a choice - you can have half of this cookie or no cookie at all.

Clementine: I don't like those choices. I want a different choice.

The hard-nosed negotiator and her partner in crime.

Mess-free painting with their cousin.

Who also painted their nails :)

Zoo with the cousins

These girls have never looked cuter - how darling is their hair?!

Remember, this is the usual coiffure around here.

A utterly inadequate but heartfelt thanks to all of Luke's Michigan family for the TLC they've given the girls!

photos and videos courtesy of MI fam

Clem-isms

Luke: [trying to elicit the word 'milk'] Focus, Josie!
Clem, chiming in: Josie, you gotta pocus. You gotta learn how to talk it.

Background: we have Apple TV with a slim, iPod-like remote. Clem was looking her newly purchased iPad mini in the box and I asked, "what is that?" and she answered, "A big moh kentroh  [remote control]."

Regarding me clinically in the bathroom pre-shower: You gonna take a shower? Your head gonna get water on it? Your arm get water on it? Your hair-bottom?     😳


What We Talk About When We Talk About Making Pancakes:




Playing the harmonica:

Clem-isms

Watching me get dressed: "Mommy, you're wearing your unicorn today!" (uniform)

Snuggling next to Luke in the morning, she wanted to sleep on his shoulder and whispered: "I want to sleep in your armpits."

Me, closing her bedroom door: "Goodnight, sweetie."
Clem, in a loud voice: "I'M NOT SWEETIE, I'M HONEY."

In a very loud, coaching voice: COME ON POO-POO, GET OUT OF MY BOTTOM POO-POO!

Indicating the tablet screen was darkened: I want it to be morning time! It took me a minute to figure out what she wanted - the screen bright again- and then I was awed at her use of language.

Darndest Things

Some recent Clem-isms/ updates from the almost-3 front:

// We were driving down the street and a shirtless runner in shortie shorts sprinted past us:  "He running! He wear panties like me!"

// She loves jigsaw puzzles. It started with a puzzle of Jerusalem my in-laws sent after their recent visit. She memorized how to put it together. Now she's working daily (WILL YOU DO THE PUZZLE WITH ME?) on a 4 puzzle Melissa & Doug kit.

// Favorite books: Fern Hollow (only as read by Daddy); The Girl Who Loved Wild Horses ('Wile Horses!); Dragons Love Tacos; Biscuit's First Halloween

// She was draping the covers over me and patting my back - 'GOODNIGHT, MOMMY - I TUCK YOU IN!' My left arm was over my head so she carefully guided it down to my side and said: "I tuck in your armpit."

// Lately she prefaces statements with I GOTTA [do whatever]. Very high drama. 'I gotta hug him! I gotta read Dragons Love Tacos!' Regarding the puzzle, we say "Work on your puzzle" and when puzzle time concludes for dinner or bedtime, she'll plead I GOTTA WORK IT! I GOTTA WORK IT!

When we arrived home from a coffee date, she turned to the babysitter she's fond of and told her matter of factly: You gotta leave.

// As we drive around, she identifies many vehicles: sports car, taxi cab, school bus. "TAXI CAB!!!"

// Phrase Most Likely To Be Adopted Into Family Vernacular:

We all had food poisoning a few weeks ago. She vomited at night and in the morning had diarrhea. Peering into the toilet at the very unfamiliar loose stools she exclaimed: My bottom is sick!

// Gems from Florida:

As we drove the few blocks looking for the house where brunch was being held (where is the party? we joked), C changed the words of 'God Our Father' [tune is Frere Jacques], singing in the backseat:

God of party

God of party

Where are you? Where are you?

Fun fun fun fun fun fun
Fun fun fun fun fun fun

Fuu-uh-uuun fuuu-uh-uuuun

This is when she became enamored of the 'miniwan' and talked all about the mini-wan back at school and zilch about the beach.

Luke: (walking down the starlit street to dinner) Look at all those stars in the sky.
Clem: I don't want a star, I want a horse.
Luke: ?